Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Dream On

2 years ago I thought that by the time I turned 18 I would be super stick thin, prancing around in sun dresses, and playing "I'm no Angel" on a guitar with my super long curly black hair wafting in the breeze. Also I planned on running away to Hollywood after Graduation (with said guitar and said sun dresses), meet Robert Pattinson while playing said song to get some money (like really, Marnie?!). Then Robby would make me a movie star, we would fall madly in love during a passionate scene in said un-named movie, and then we would live happily ever after, making beautiful music, with our beautiful babies, in A-list fame and luxury.

Obviously none of that happened.

1 day away from being 18 and I'm still sitting on my (voluptuous ) ass, computer glued to my lap, cat fast asleep above me, and mother fast asleep across from me, but even though it seems like nothing at all changed, and my life is going completely no where, everything is different.

I've learned more life lessons in past 2 years then I've learned in my whole life. I've learned the real meaning of grief, and all the beautiful things that eventually bloom from that pain. I've also learned not to be afraid of intimacy, that life is worth living, and that dreams can come true, but at their own pace.

And although nothing from the first paragraph haven't happened doesn't mean it can't. I know my ideas, and plans are far-fetched, but who knows, maybe 2 years from now I'll be blogging from a cafe in California, wearing a little white sun dress, and drinking iced tea with R. Pattz.

Marnie

P.S. Since I've turned into a total gleek, I felt the need to name my post after one of the most epic performance Ive ever seen :)